What's Important

This last month has made me re prioritize my life. I feel like every so often, everyone needs to step back and regain what is important in their life. People get lost in the hustle and bustle of life and lose sight of what they should be spending more time on. Family and close friends. I'm guilty of this. Everyone is! I work and work and I love my job. I'm gone all day, only to come home, rarely see my family, go out, come home, and do this cycle over again. More time needs to be spent with my family, cause they are and always have been there for me. And I'm here for anything they need.

I recently got some bad news, and my family isn't quite sure yet of the complete results. We won't know for awhile. But let's just say that I wish it were me. I would trade her places in a heartbeat. It seriously pains me to know that she has to go through all this and the stress. I went out to arizona for sister/sister time and had an amazing trip. It got our minds off it for a little bit at least. I just wish I could see her everyday. But I'll be out there at the drop of a hat if needed. Even if it involves flying on a plane with a man that won't stop his creepin, and tells me he isn't human. (Biggest character ever haha).

What I'm getting at is my family and TRUE friends are my life. If you need me, don't hesitate to ask me for anything. I love you all and I would do anything for you.

Situations like this make me realize that sometimes, as terrible as it sounds, I keep more filth in my life than needed. I am not a dramatic person. I absolutely am repulsed by drama and dramatic people. Yet, I find that I am around it more than I care to be. I don't know why haha I had a friend tell me that I do this because I like to be there for people or that I'm drawn to people who are broken, cause I'm a handygirl and want to fix things. I think they are right. haha I'm trying really hard to keep this to a minimum. Of course I'll be there for my close friends, but it's gotten to the point where I no longer feel like being walked on. I don't want to be a push-over. If you are an ounce of drama in my life, you will rarely hear from me. End of story.

And boy does it feel good! I have enough to stress over in life. Why add to it? :)

Aside from my mumbling, I have realized that I have not written in quite some time! A lot has happened. I saw Kelly in AZ. My brother came out too and is loving arizona. I'm so glad! I'm job hunting/apartment hunting in Denver. Cannot wait to live with Trisha again!

Done a bunch of photo shoots; behind and in front of the camera. Photography is such a release for me. I'm glad I finally found my destresser to life. yes please!

I am hoping to go on a roadtrip still in july with the lovely sean and blair and ash if she can join! I need to see some old friends <3

Aside from that, I have new photos on flickr!



And yeah! I'll probably think of more later, but for now, I'm grateful for everything in my life. And everyone in my life.

"I don't care how poor a man is; if he has family, he's rich." ~Dan Wilcox



Besos!

Here comes the sun

I'm not really sure what to update on. A lot of good things have been happening! Things are picking up and I couldn't be happier!

I'm still nannying, which honestly is the best job ever. I don't even want to go out and get a "real world" job yet haha I mean...I MUST by november for health insurance, but other than that, what's the rush? No rush at all I say!

Enjoying work, paying stuff off finally! Seeing more of my best friends which couldn't make me happier. I love seeing more of Ashley Lanhammmm and Trisha Marie! I feel a bajillion times better after this surgery and am finally out and about like I was before. Only with a better looking neck and stomach and less pain. Yippy! haha

I've recently booked a TON of shoots too! This month is going to be amazing! I went with Stephers ( <3) to a fabric store and picked up a ton of goodies for some upcoming shoots. I cannot wait to use them and see the outcome. I have a pin-up girl shoot coming up, some full out spring shoots, mother's day shoots, a caution shoot, some band promos, etc etc. I'm so beyone excited to get behind the camera again! I have about 15+ scheduled shoots. YES PLEASE! I'm so grateful!

Also, an unexpected call yesterday had me giggling, but kind of excited. I got a call from an agency in Missouri that wants to sign me haha I think it's hilarious cause I honestly don't take the modeling thing seriously, nor will I ever call myself a model haha But if she can get me some more paid gigs to pay off my stuff, could be good! Plus, paid travel if needed. YES PLEASE. So I'm thinking about it! Could be something new and fun and exciting:) And the best part is, I don't have to move for it. weee!

Well last night was so much fun, and Nick is back! I'm so happy! What an amazing surprise haha

Here's to what looks like an amazing summer! <33333 x's infinity.

New Beginnings

I don't know why, but lately I feel as if I'm starting over. Rebooting my life. I'm not sure why? I think that most of this feeling has to do with me finally going through with the surgery. Kind of a step one. Not erasing the past with this per se, but kind of coming to terms with it. Accepting it. Moving on. What happened to me 5 years ago was the worst I'd have to go through in my life I hope. I battled for my life, and once that was won, I battled until recently to have my old life back in a way. A life with no physical restrictions. Back to normalcy. Of course I was doing everything I did before for the most part, short of running a marathon. But I always had that discomfort from the old scars. As much as I loved my battle wounds, they needed fixed, and I think taking that step of finally fixing them, finally helped me to overcome all that had happened and almost start anew:) Not gonna lie, but it is scary; graduating from college and having too many options. Not used to that and it makes me nervous that I cannot decide what to do with myself. Where do I move? Where do I work? Do I want to go to grad school (a yes for sure), but for what? and where? and when? 

I think lately I've been freaking too much about the future, and I need to stop. I need to take it a day at a time. Just make a decision! I need to stick to that decision, and if it's not for me, I now have the power to change my circumstances. I have nothing holding me back now. No school. Not a serious job. No relationship. So... if I want to up and move, nothing is stopping me! Now to the part where I can't decide on where to go haha Help??

I think maybe this has been why I've been feeling SO anxious lately. Like a constant anxiety attack haha I'm happy of course! But antsy. I need newness. I need to make a decision on SOMETHING new haha I don't like being so indecisive haha

Options:

1. Move to CA

2. Move to NY

3. Move to Nashville

4. Job hunt (is a must still. Continue)

5. Grad school (when? where?)

6. Internships for photography

7. Move to Denver

8. Travel (or move somewhere completely random)

9. Stay home and work in paying off some student loan debt

10. Etc etc. fml

Hard to decide. Im SO comfortable in colorado. My home. But some parts of me wants to move somewhere, where no one knows me. Start over kind of. But I just love my friends too much and would miss them entirely too much. So what to do, what to do haha

I know this is just a babbling blog, but I think I just need to get stuff outta my head, and down where I can read them, so I can better sort through life at this moment. :)

Other updaters...I went to dinner/drinks with Jackie tonight. Much needed conversation and I'm so glad it happened. I had a ton of fun tonight. Got me out of the house finally, and had some fun. Met some characters that's for sure haha. 

Talked to Kelly tonight. I miss her So much! Stupid distance. But it was good to hear her voice and she always calms my anxious nerves haha Thanks sister<3

Well, I think it is time for me to sleep. I needed to clear my mind and this helped. I'm sure I'll read over it later and realize that I just wrote a repeating run-on sentence about how I don't know what to do with my life right now haha It'll change soon though. I smell change in the wind. And I'm excited for it. Surgery was step one. There are more to come! I can't wait. 

Besos!

Ps. And thank you to:

Mew for being the soundtrack to my life lately:)

How About A Knife Fight?

At least it looks like I got into one! Finally, after what...5 years of putting it off, finally got the surgery done that I needed. I went in last week to get my throat (tracheotomy scar) and stomach (peg tube scar) fixed. Both had always been uncomfortable and still tender even after 5 years so I knew something was wrong. Went in, they fixed it. Turns out I had torn muscles in them they had to fix! Well well well that could explain my discomfort, and possibly the reason for my inability to achieve a six-pack. Or, that could just be due to my excessive fast food runs lately? haha

Ye ol battle wounds. I'm excited to see what it looks like. I really will miss my old scar though:( But this one I'm excited for. My neck is completely new again. It feels amazing! 

So it has come to my attention that I have not blogged in what seems like forever! Or a month. Either way, long time! I don't even know where to begin on updates. There are too many. My 3oh!3 fam was in town along with Graham and Spencer and Allyce! I guess Graham and Spencer are doing a show for tv involving the 3oh!3 boys and Graham asked for my help in one of the skit things. This included beer, spit in my face, at the show haha Mama will be SO proud. I hear Allyce's is even better though haha

I 've been doing a lot of shoots lately for some extra money haha Been nice! But to be honest, it's bumming me out that my flickr has not been updated in awhile. I need to fix that stat. I've had the honor of working with Virtual Fashion Studios:

And for Theresa Photography for To Go Clothing:




And I have a couple coming up which should be fun! I just cannot wait to get back into the other side of the camera though. I have so many ideas that I'm getting anxious! New models: men and women, Let's make some art, yeah?

What else...

I visited Kelly with my mom! Out in good ol' Tempe. It was SO much fun. And Mama Geha closed down the bars two nights in a row. I was such a proud daughter haha


<33333 x's infinity

I would update on the creepy secret men's society that I attended with Rex, Graham and Spencer...but I'm too lazy. Just leave you with this. Creepy hats, creepy robes, creepy goblets, just....creepy. *shivers*

Had been spending a lot of time with someone in Denver. Not sure how that's really going, but I think that it may just be better left as friends? Don't want to ruin a good thing, ya know?  All I know is hanging out with you has been great. And I truly value a good friendship the most:)

Ps. Can I say awkward turtle from last week? GOOD LORD. haha

Well, I can't think of anything else to say right now. I should get to sleep. Tomorrow is my first day (full day at that) back to work after my surgery. I'm still kinda gimping around, so I suppose I need a full night's sleep. Goodnight! <3

Enjoying life + ignoring drama = LEGIT

Lately there has been such a mix of good and weird. Not bad. Just different I guess haha I'm not quite sure how to explain it! But, a lot of good happening and I'm so stoked about it. 

First order of business: Photo shoots. For some reason, I have had some INTENSE feelings of just wanting to do photo shoots all of the time. I have been overflowing with ideas and themes. I haven't been this passionate about something since I was studying science in school (as nerdtastic as that sounds). Someone help me bring all these photo ideas to life! I want new faces to my portfolio, men and women. Let's do this! 

Also, I've recently had the pleasure of booking actual photo shoots with wonderful photographers to do a little work on the other side of the camera haha Should be interesting! It has been awhile, but I'm really excited. There are some wonderful photographers I will be SO lucky to work with in the next couple months! I think my next one will actually be with the amazing Leo Howard in Phoenix, AZ! Check out his website!

LEO HOWARD WEBSITE

So excited to work with him! We booked the shoot for the weekend I'm in Tempe, and if my sister is okay with it, I asked to do a sister shoot! haha Thought it would be so fun to do one with her!

Thrilled to do both types of photo shoots! Hopefully being in front of the camera, and behind the camera, will help me to better learn lighting, poses, etc. 

Aside from that shiznet, I have had a pretty great week! Finally been able to catch up with my friends in Denver. I've missed them SO much! I do not see enough of them. One thing I love so much about my Denver crew...even if I don't see them for a month plus, when we hangout, it's always the same. They understand people get busy. They understand that I do indeed have other friends I'd like to see sometimes too. They understand that I need family time. And they understand that sometimes...you just need a break from going out or down to Denver/Boulder. I love them for that! They would never get mad if I couldn't go out, or even if I wasn't in the mood to go out. That is a huge quality I consider a good friend to possess. UNDERSTANDING. You don't have to see that person everyday, yet when you hangout, both of you are just so happy to see each other and the time apart means nothing:) Love you my Denver babies! 

It was so wonderful to see my Trisha, not once...but TWICE this week! I've missed my roomie. Went to Sputnik/Hi Dive a couple nights back. Had a blast hanging out with Chase, Amber, Nicole! Went next door to get some food at Sputnik and hungout with Brandon, and some newbies to my world: Jonathan and Joe, who were both such a pleasure to hangout with. We all stayed there for so long then migrated to Denver diner and ate again. Mhmmm...

So fun hanging out! Huge smile on my face:)

What else is new...

An insane little blizzard has hit! I went out with Trisha last night with her friend Andrew. We all had so much fun! Even down to the phone hunt on the railroad tracks. Still cannot believe he found it! Then Trisha, Andrew and I had a cuddlesesh and awoke to insane snow. So I drove home and it took a nice 2 hrs to get home haha

Also, I have done a photoshoot with Miss Lanham to try out my new studio! I'm in love with her photos. Here are a couple of my safari babe!

So much fun! A lot more shoots coming up, including a pin up girl shoot, possibly a roller rink one as well!

Finally, had some quality time with my favorite boys, Sean and James in Boulder after an outdoor day with Miss Lanham! It was gorgeous, and so windy haha






Oh good times. And Sean shaved off his hair and donated it! He's so sweet! Amazing.

Well, aside from that, I'm just hoping the snow melts so I can venture out tomorrow. It was a little too snowy to today. Here is a vid I made my sister today to show her the snow, and our dog Gabi's reluctance to go outside to go to the bathroom haha Unfortunately, I finally get her out there and I trip over her. I'm so graceful.



Gahhh haha

Alright. Time for bed! Hopefully tomorrow I can get outta t-town and hangout cause I'm losin my mind bored over here! haha

Mad About Plaid

Not gonna lie. Got the most epic email ever today on my flickr. haha:

Ciao KARI


YOU ARE VERY very very BEAUTIFUL....I SAW YOUR PHOTOS ...i loved you so much
YOU ARE VERY LOVELY.
I'M ITALIAN....MY NAME IS ANTONIO
I'M TOTALLY MAD ABOUT PLAID... I'm an admin OF A facebook a group called “CAMICIE A QUADRI” THAT in italian means "plaid shirts"...
A COLLECTION OF GIRLS WEARING PLAID SHIRTS
i hAVE A GREAT PLAID PASSION.
I WOULD LOVE to HAVE SOME PHOTOS OF YOU WEARING PLAID SHIRTS ....I LOVE CHECK BURBERRY SHIRTS .......I LOVE GIRLS WEARING MEN'S PLAID (or checked) SHIRTS OR WESTERN PLAID SHIRTS...

TANXXXX A LOT !!!

Not gonna lie. But that pretty much made my day hahahahaha I cackled. It's pretty much amazing. I wish I were into something as much as that man is into plaid. I should start up a new obsession. Hmmm....maybe cargo jorts? haha ew. 

In other news:

KARI GOT A NEW PHOTOGRAPHY STUDIO SET UP!!!!

Ahhhh...I seriously could not be happier. It literally has everything. Soft boxes, umbrellas, strobes, barn door light with gels, trigger, etc, etc, AMAZING. I spent all day today getting acquainted with how it goes together and works. Just waiting for my background stand to hang the muslin background on. But aside from that, it's all there. The best part. It all folds into a duffle bag so I can travel with it! Hello on location photo shoots:) Anyone in need? Call me. I'll give you a good price haha

Played around with the lighting today:

Excuse my wet hair. I was just out of the shower and was too excited to get ready first, so I started playing around and testing my new lighting. This is definitely way too bright, but I loved how clear it made everything else. Such as my eyes and hair. So much more detail. This was done with just one soft box. Can't wait to start shooting studio work now! :)

Okay, aside from photo stuff, I can't even remember my last update. I guess new events would consist of my Courtney hangout before she left on tour again. I miss her so much! Her and I had a day out in boulder, consisting of physical activities (hiking a little haha) to Boulder Falls and having photo fun. 

LOVE HER! What a babe. And boy do I miss her. I hopefully could round up some dinero to meet her out on tour for a couple days (that is if it's ok with the boys). I can't go till may without seeing her and my boulderites haha Shet!

After our hiking date she left and I met up with my best guy friends, Sean and James at Rail Jam on the Hill in Boulder. Ended up doing photos for the Roxy tent and getting some awesome free stuff. Had so much fun!

Phew...Lot's of photos in this blog haha Sorry. I need to update more often. Anyways, Rail Jam was so much fun. (lots of very attractive men. rawr haha) and I had a blast with my faves, as always. I love my Boulder boys!

Finally, I have been seeing a lot more of:



BROTHER! And couldn't be happier. I love this guy. And he makes me laugh harder than anyone haha

Well, off to bed I go. A good weekend ahead. But got to squeeze in some job hunting before the fun tomorrow. I mean geesh, someone hire me for something!!!!haha frick. Not letting it get me down though. I suppose I should enjoy this time off for once. Never had it. Probably never will again haha So cheers to getting stuff done, and learning things that I enjoy and now have the time to do. At least for a little while:)

Good night everyone, and stay classy lol

Ps. St. Patty's Day pics will be up in next blog. This one is a little photo-ed out haha

I love YOU so much (in a helium voice)

This last weekend was a lot of fun. Had some quality time with two of my friends which I quite frankly, do not see enough of. I miss them! I also had a birthday celebration with my mom:) Her and I went to dinner and hungout for the night. It was great spending some time with mama geha! She's so adorable.

Then saturday was hangout time with my old roommate Stephanie! I love this little lady. We decided to plan a photoshoot that day. I need new faces in my portfolio and Steph is perfect for it. She's gorgeous, sweet, fun, and has perfect clothes for it. And to top it off....she does makeup! haha So we had some fun running around taking pictures. Got some coffee because it's so cold, and then played around with balloons in some pictures. They came out amazing! The red balloons were perfect in the pictures. Everything around right now is dead and brown, so the red balloons added some much needed color to the area haha Here are a few photos!







Yay! After our photosesh we went back to her apt and hungout and became the age of 12 years old by playing with the helium in the balloons haha

HELIUM LOVE VIDEOOOOOO: Clicky hurr

Good times haha

"I love YOU so much"-Steph haha aww!

Then came Sunday Funday! And hangout time with Chris. Long overdue. Finally saw his new house in Denver. Looks amazing! So excited for him. We did a couple headshots there, then wandered around Denver for the rest. It was PERFECT out too. Must have been around 70+ degrees. Gorgeous. Afterwards finally got to watch Eli's film which starred non other, then Mr. Chris:) Good times. Here are some photos from Yesterday!

Had so much fun!!!! Also, found the most epic wall of life:



Now tell me that isn't the most amazing painting ever haha Shades, mustaches, epic.

Had so much fun this weekend! Love my friends!!!

<3

Rain is gonna fall, Sun is gonna shine

I just realized I'm playing the most depressing playlist right now. ew! haha I don't even know why. It reminds me of when I made it too haha Changinnnn gears to something upbeat. Something, fun. Maybe a little Santogold haha. Cause I am in a good mood dammit!

So I suppose it's update time. I haven't written in so long! I'm a slackin. I guess I'll start with the windiest photoshoot ever. Gusts up to what seemed to be 60mph? haha Good lord. And it was freezing. Here are some! It was with my lovah Ashley. She tried some of her own photo skills as well!







Yay:)

What else this weekend? My friend Ryan was in town! I realized we took like...NO pictures haha I have one or two haha sad. I'll put those up next time. But him and the Electric Valentine kids and their adorable puppy crashed with me for a couple days. So much fun and they are sweethearts. I had a blast! The first night they came in, they scooped me and we went to their show at the Lifespot. Before the show we visited Ryan's old house cause it was literally down the street! Afterwards we went to Nick's casa and had some drinks and played with the puppy. Aaron, Nick and all of us definitely had puppy wounds. Puppies have razor teeth!

The next day they left to go to their colorado springs show and I went to foco for my massage. Thank you Mrs. Pitner! I needed it. I definitely left with bruises though. I needed the deep tissue though haha Thank you car accident.

Then after I went to a concert with my dad:) He was so cute and so excited haha. And it was actually a great show! And I have a crush on a married man. haha He was so pretty with his black button down and his guitar. Rawr.

Then I came home and a few hours later the EV kids arrived, puppy and all:) And we all passed out. They left the next day after we all had lunch. I miss them! It was nice to have company around haha

I'm trying to remember anything new? I can't be old enough to lose my memory YET!

May not be in order, but:

-Allyce had her last night out in Denver:( I'm so sad! It's going to be weird not having her around. It was good to see Angela that night too. Her and I had a dinner date at Watercourse and met up with Allyce for the night:)

-I had another job interview. Cross your fingers I get a paycheck stat. lol

-Had ice cream with my lovah miss lanham today. mmmm banana splits. Although I had a casualty during the joyous occasion when I swallowed a bug. How the crap? I need to make sure my mouth isn't so wide open when I laugh. EW! It was discusting. Blahhh.....

-Drove to Denver and saw Allyce one more time in Denvah. We played some skate game for awhile and laughed at all the wrecks we got. Got some pretty good ones haha And then her and Kamruz drove off to Cali:( I'm gonna miss that girl...

AND

It is officially Mama Geha's birthday!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAMA!

We are going to dinner tomorrow to celebrate:)

More pics to come. But for now. I sleep. Toodles e-world!

Why don't you put yourself in my suitcase

I MISS KELLY! 

Last week I went out to Tempe, AZ to see her. I had so much fun. I always miss my sister. I flew in thursday morning at the crack of dawn. (*cough*7am*cough*) Although I'm not a morning person, getting there that early was well worth it. Full day ahead! Which consisted of day drinks at Hooters haha Always a problem because then I get extremely tired and Kelly and I napped through dinner till 9pm after we got home. Wide awake but didn't want to go out, so while everyone was out, her and I saw "Fired Up's" midnight showing haha Don't judge. It's all there was. And surprisingly, it was freaking hilarious! Then came friday night extravaganza. Sushi dinner with my faves and then out on Mill. Always a blast! Came home at 3am for a little hot tubbing, some hummus from Munchies and passing out. Epic. Saturday we went out for Jeremy's birthday to Casey Moore's.

"It will feel like you are home in Boulder Kari!"

Jeremy was right. I walked in, saw at least 3 people with dreads, a multitude of hipsters, and a mixture of other people I would totally see at a Boulder bar haha It was a good time:) Then off to Jeremy and Zach's to pass out where we ended up watching "27 dresses", discussing how a song at the end is just like one of Lilly Allens, and pass out. 

Sunday we had an Oscar's party with Christian, Jeremy, and Kel at Taylors, where everyone (*cough*Jeremy*cough) put his hair in a ponytail, sumo bun and and attempted to karate punch everyone, nearly killing me with his flying sneaker from a high kick haha

"YOU ALMOST JUST DIED!" -Kelly 

Twas fun regardless haha Then my last day in town, Kelly and I ran around by ourselves and had a photo adventure at a place I kept driving past. I loved it! GIANT wall of nicely placed railroad remnants with a pathway through the center. So we went to have a heyday, get some Hawaiian food and take me to the airport. Always so sad leaving! :(

Here are a few photos from the trip:

Yay photos! lol Miss Kelly! But hopefully I can see her and my AZ family again asap...

Random question: Isn't it always awkward when the dentist asks you questions when you clearly cannot answer due to all the cleaning tools in your mouth? haha Happened today a few times when I went and I'm sure all my answers consisted of mumbles and spitting. Hot. haha

Well, off to run some errands and hopefully hangout with my Ashley's later, whom I've missed so much! :)

Hello Sunshine!

Could you have asked for a prettier day in Colorado today? You would never guess it is only February! So my ladies and I decided it was time for a picnic! Miss Lanham and I met up with Miss Mouw at her job and she ordered us yummy food to go. Then all of us drove to Boulder and threw out my giant quilt and had ourselves a lovely little picnic. YES! Nothing better than my two ladies, yummy food, sunshine and being surrounded by the mountains:)

Here are some pics. We climbed some trees, ran through the field, did some high kick jumping. You know...the usual haha

Oh how I love my ladies. Afterwards we met up with our libster and did a little shopping. Such a wonderful day! 

And how was this last weekend? Amazing as well. I've been just absolutely happy lately. Love life. This weekend My dates were Ashley, Ashley and Breanna for Valentines day. We went out in Denver and ran into some friends:) Then saturday night consisted of movies de la past! My ashley's and I watched "Now and Then" (assigned each of us to one of the characters haha. Made it hilarious. Ashley L-"I get the fat one??" hahaha) Then we watched "My Girl" and I balled my flippin eyes out. 

"Would you think of me?"

Ahhhhh my gosh. I forgot how good that movie is. Adorable. And the girl in there reminds me of my sis and I when we were little munchkins haha

Plans for the week:

Tomorrow: Dinner with my Ashley's and Luis! Then my friends' concert in Denver!

Wednesday: Packinggggg. Errands. 

Thursday: AZ BOUND!!!! Feb. 19-23rd. I cannot wait to see kelly<3

Have a good week everyone xo